How To Recover From A Bad / Negative First Impression

This post may contain affiliate links, including Amazon.com(and affiliate Sites/Stores.)Any One Can Shop from this blog.Using links to these sites means I may earn a small percentage from  purchases made at no extra cost to you.

Hey Everyone!,

How To Recover From A Negative First 

Impression

Bad first impressions can be difficult to recover from, but it’s not impossible.

It turns out the old adage, “You never get a second chance to make a great first impression,” may not be true after all.

There’s a great deal of pressure around making a positive first impression–and for good reason. Some studies say an impression is formed within the first seven seconds of meeting someone. First impressions happen quickly, which is why we dress up for a job interview or a date.

So what happens when your first impression is less than favorable? Say on your first encounter with a new client, your car broke down on the way to work, making you late for the meeting, and then after leaving them waiting, you call them by the wrong name. The encounter might have left your new client assuming that you are frazzled and unprofessional.

It can be difficult to recover from bad first impressions. This is partially because our brains have a hard time adapting to change and don’t like to accept information that is contrary to what we already believe. It’s easier for your client to continue to think that you’re unprofessional, even when presented with information to the contrary. You may show up on time to the next meeting and call your client by the right name, yet they may still hold on to that negative first impression of you. Despite this, there is hope. It’s not impossible to recover, says professional coach Janet Zaretsky.

Here’s what you should do

Decide Whether or Not to Take Action

Before you decide how to address a bad first impression, you must first ask whether it’s necessary to respond at all. Not all bad first impressions are created equal. Who you were trying to impress will have an impact on whether or not you decide to take action to remedy your stumble.

If you just met someone on the street or if it’s a person you casually met at a cocktail party and you made a bad impression, then the best response might be no response. “I’m all about building a confident first impression but sometimes people get too caught up in having to make a perfect first impression,” says Dr. Dave Stachowiak, a leadership trainer with Dale Carnegie Training and host of the Coaching for Leaders podcast.

If the relationship is not one that is all that important for your business or for you personally, then you might just need to let it go. “We all make bad first impressions. It’s just human nature,” says Stachowiak. “We have a bad day. Does it really matter to try to fix it? Is it really a big deal? If not, let it go.”

On the other hand, if the person was really important to you — like a new boss, a VIP, a future in-law, or even a date you were excited about — then how you respond is of course of much greater importance.

If in fact the relationship does merit some kind of response, then the following tips will get you back on track.

APOLOGIZE WHEN NECESSARY

If you’ve done or said something offensive, apologize, but Zaretsky says, don’t overdo it. “Most people are very forgiving and will move on if you do,” she says. When apologizing, make sure it’s authentic. Don’t focus on the reasons why you did or said something; simply apologize for your behavior and state your desire to rectify the relationship and start over. Avoid apologizing over and over, bringing up that negative first encounter and reminding the person of what they first thought of you.

Apologize Later, Even If Time Has Passed

Often people stall at making an apology because they are not sure if one is necessary, and then when they decide they should apologize or explain away their bad first impression, they are not sure if they should even proceed because too much time has passed.

The truth is, even if you apologize hours or days later, people often appreciate the gesture.

Business coach Kevin Waldron does this, even if it’s a day or two later. “Let’s say I said something stupid about your mother,” says Waldron. “I would call back the next day and say ‘In my poor attempt at Scottish humor, I said something about your mother and I didn’t mean it that way — it was just my poor attempt at humor.’”

Even if you feel like too much time has gone by for you to make an effort to apologize, there is little harm in doing it anyways.

Pivot

One of the best approaches for recovering from a bad first impression is to pivot by showing off a different and more favorable side of your personality. In other words, if you tried to crack a joke and it fell flat, then demonstrate sincerity. Or if you tried to be sincere and it rang hollow, then demonstrate compassion. Pivoting to focus on a different aspect of your personality may help to reshape the perception of your character and value.

Sometimes pivoting can make all the difference in the world. In 1939, a young and self-assured 20-year-old U.S. Army pilot on weekend leave was visiting the World’s Fair in Queens, New York. He spotted an attractive young woman named Peggy Gallagher, who was sitting at an information booth.

He walked straight up to her and said he needed some information. “What do you need?” she asked. He said he wanted to know if she would have dinner with him that night.

The pilot was my grandfather, and the woman behind the information booth was my grandmother, who was actually on a break from her job as a model in the Billy Rose Aquacade show. My grandmother was initially turned off by the ploy and the rather direct approach. She thought my grandfather was a full-of-himself pilot — which I suppose he was. Fortunately though, my grandmother gave him a shot, and my grandfather later got another opportunity at winning her over. That’s when he pivoted and showed off different, less cocky aspects of his personality, such as his sense of humor. By pivoting, he got over his initial bad first impression.

If he hadn’t pivoted, I might not be here to tell that story.

GET OVER YOUR NEGATIVE SELF-TALK

Part of the reason it’s so difficult to recover from a poor first impression, Zaretsky says, is that we tend to ruminate on it too much ourselves. By replaying the situation over and over in our own heads and beating ourselves up for what we said or did, we tend to show up the next time trying too hard to not repeat the mistake or impress that we missed an opportunity to show our true selves.

Our brain chemicals also don’t help the situation. “When we experience a moment of embarrassment or shame, we are secreting a negative ‘chemical cocktail’ that puts us into a survival posture,” says Zaretsky. When in this state, our brain’s ability to connect, empathize, and be our full self is diminished. The other person also senses our discomfort, further compounding the situation. Forgiving yourself and letting go of the embarrassment frees you to be your authentic self the next time you come face-to-face with the person. If this individual had an inaccurate first impression of you, showing them your true self is the best way to change their opinion.

 Be Consistent Over Time

Another way of responding to a bad first impression is by demonstrating sincerity and consistency over time following that first poor showing. This approach is harder and obviously is more of a long game, but ultimately can cement stronger relationships. “What is harder — and what most people don’t do — is correct a bad first impression through your actions of how you care later,” says Stachowiak. “It doesn’t matter what you do one or two times. It matters what you do consistently over time. That’s how you correct a bad first impression.”

Stachowiak acknowledged he personally tends to not make great first impressions, but that his strategy is to make up for it later. “It’s the consistent follow up, communication, listening, and remembering things about people 6 months or one year later that make a difference,” he says.

FIND OUT HOW PEOPLE PERCEIVE YOU

Most of us don’t know what type of impression we give. We think of ourselves in a certain way and assume that others see us in that light as well. To find out how accurate your assumptions are about the type of first impression you are making with people, Zaretsky recommends interviewing three to five people who are close to you and who you trust to tell you the truth. Let them know that you are working on your professional development and would appreciate their honest feedback about what they first thought of you when you met.

Avoid being offended by their comments, but instead use them to be better aware of how you are perceived by others, so you can make any necessary changes.

Hope you enjoyed reading this;)

“Do you agree?Please Share your thoughts in the comments below as I learn just as much from you as you do from me!”

Bye for Know,

Sameer

There’s more to that

If you’re looking for more,Please subscribe to my blog by clicking on Subscribe in a reader icon or Subscribe via Email by submitting your email id on the side bar ;)

Bad,Negative,First,Impressions,Body Language  ,Self ,
Improvement , Psychology, Optimize

Like it? Share it…